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Showing posts from 2017

First blog in November....

This is my first personal blog post in a while! I am sorry I have been so MIA, but it feels good to be posting something for the first time in a while. There is something so therapeutic and peaceful about blogging while listening to my favorite Christmas tunes. Yes, I’m a Christmas freak, and I am not ashamed of it either. The Glee holiday tracks are some of my very favorites. I am sure you have heard the news by now if you follow me on any sort of social media, but I got a new fur babe. His name is Toby, and he is an almost 5 month old Golden Doodle. The most adorable dog I have ever seen, and I am totally head over heels in love with him. If you know me well, you know I tend to fall in love with any sort of dog, but Toby is irresistible! He is a ton of work and is not yet housetrained. Unfortunately, that means cleaning up a lot of urine. I know he will eventually grow out of it. To be perfectly honest, during Cleo’s final months, her bladder became an issue, so I became quite the pr...

Depression: The three headed monster

Life certainly has a way of conjuring up its inner monster. I would say more than half of the time we really don’t have any idea why bad things are happening to us. Problems in life are inevitable. They are going to happen and sometimes, though not on purpose, we fall into the trap of depression. Depression is much more than the monster under your bed. It is a teeming shadow that follows you around trying to rid you of all things good and positive. It is what might be referred to as the devil on your shoulder. Depression is not just something you get over. Once experienced, it never completely goes away. I wish I had a magic wand to eliminate the negative things from all our minds. It can also show up unexpectedly when it is most unwelcome. It can terrorize you when you least expect it, even when you have been happy for months. It can appear out of nowhere. When I was younger and first experienced depression, I did not understand how to cope. Now that I am older, I realize that it i...

The Boredom Bug

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The boredom bug is bound to bite all of us at a certain point in life. Sometimes its bite is sharp and unrelenting. Other times, a simple activity will alleviate the boredom and you will soon forget you were ever unoccupied. When I was younger, the boredom bug used to bite me all the time. For some reason or another, I could not combat the boredom bug when I was home during the week! It was honestly awful, and I noticed that I complained more at that time more than I ever did before! I am beyond glad that I am no longer bored so easily. To be fair though, I presently write for two different websites so the creative overflow keeps me busy and constantly thinking. I don’t have the time any longer to let the boredom consume my mind. Too much time to think negatively is never good. That is the precise moment when your depression (if you are a sufferer) will overtake you. Depression is surely a tricky bastard. It will spend all its time haunting you until you cannot take it anymore and may ...

Work hard in silence

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I honestly think that quote blogs are my favorite type of entry to piece together. I especially like writing about things I can directly relate to. Over the past couple of years, I have been working really hard to hone my craft and work on perfecting it even further. I have not done this alone of course. To be perfectly honest, I think I am a much better writer now than I was just a short 5 years ago when I first published my poetry collection. Yes, the work in those books were good. Some pieces were exceptional. However, now, I find that I am getting better at writing in prose. I am working with a number of blog sites to try to zero in on this side of my talent so that I can finally graduate to writing my memoir without too much confusion and fuss. Of course, I am always excited and thrilled when a blog company picks up on one of my posts and decides to publish it. That feeling is the feeling I live for. Writing is what I was meant to do and it is certainly humbling when others fin...

Masterpiece

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From the beginning of time, we are careful to craft our life and the experiences surrounding it. We do our best to make sure that our life is as comfortable and content as possible. Of course, everyone wants their life to flow perfectly, but, unfortunately, that is not the nature of life. Shit happens. Not to throw you off course, but because the good and the bad create an equal balance. Your attitude plays a huge role in this significant balance. I am not saying that your attitude will completely reverse all the awful things that happen to you. However, when you have a positive attitude, it tends to make the bad things sting a little less. The good things do come around when you are patient and willing to wait in the balance. The good things allow for great balance and comfort in your life. Once you have discovered your life’s purpose and you have the fire in your eyes, nothing can stop you except yourself! Everyone has their own passions and with that passion, they paint their ow...

It seems impossible

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It is so easy to make the remark “just get it done”. It is so much harder to obtain the energy and motivation to do something you have been meaning to do but keep putting it off. The reason you are putting it off likely must have something to do with what you are lacking. Maybe you do not have the confidence. Maybe you fear rejection and thinking you are not good enough. I have officially been a writer for 5 years now. Even though I have been officially published twice and now have been seen on numerous websites, my negative thinking still creeps in and tells me I will never really make it from time to time. While writing my memoir is still a strong dream of mine, I am waiting a couple more years to hone my skills and appreciate and experience more of life. To be honest, I am not sure I have the confidence to embark on the journey of writing a book. These blogs certainly do help and are contributing to me improving my writing skills and to understand what it is like to write ever...

Life UPDATE!!!

Change is always something that challenges us, whether positive or negative. I am proud to announce that I have some positive ones to share with you that could mean a lot more attention in the writing world for me across the world wide web! Of course, many of you are familiar with this blog, especially lately because I have really started to add to it content wise. In addition to this, I have been selected as a contributor for The Mighty and Project Wednesday, both of which are highly empowering blogging sites that have the potential to reach out to others. I am realizing now that my impact is limitless, and that alone makes me extremely excited!! Now just because I am going to be working on multiple platforms does not mean that I am going to abandon this blog. I’m just going to be twice as busy. Not a problem for me at all! Writing is my passion, and I will use every last breath I have to keep chasing after it!!

Lifehouse show #10/First Switchfoot show :)

Oh my. Where oh where do I even begin??? That is a good question to ask myself, right?? To be honest, this past weekend was filled with such excitement and love that I am not even sure where to begin, but I’ll do my best to make it flow and give y’all the best recap possible!! This weekend, I travelled with my good friend Nicole to see our favorite band Lifehouse! Nicole and I connected through our love of Lifehouse, and I always felt like they were the bridge to our friendship! I was going to Jacksonville thanks to Nicole’s generous heart & her lovely idea to purchase VIP tickets for me as a birthday present! This will absolutely go down as the best and most fitting birthday gift I have ever received! I have been an avid fan of Lifehouse for 17 years now! I fell in love with their music at the very beginning of time and have never looked back! They have helped me through the darkest and most tumultuous parts of my life and for that, I’ll be forever grateful! They are the reason th...

Lifehouse: My musical Angels & why they mean SO much to me!

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You may see me refer to Lifehouse very often as my musical angels or loves. The purpose of this blog will be to tell you about Lifehouse’s impact and why their music means so much to me. My love affair with Lifehouse and their music began in 2001 when I saw their video for “Hanging by a Moment” for the first time. As a teenager, I had always liked alternative music, but there was something that I loved about them. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it yet, but as soon as I made the effort to purchase their debut album “No Name Face”, I would find out very quickly. I know that many of you follow me on social media or even just follow my blog and see me as a happy go lucky type of person who is not affected by much drama or negativity. While that may be true of my personality now, I wasn’t always like this. This transformation was 17 years in the making. I had a very hard time coming to terms with being in a wheelchair and seen as different by nearly everyone else around me. In 20...

A Poem for Domestic Violence awareness

Hello there, guys, I was up throughout the night, and this poem popped into my head. I swear I could not get it out. Of all these tears I have cried I don’t know if they will ever dry I have even listened to your dusty Blues records that we put up on the shelf I walked for miles to help you find your true Self But all the scratching and clawing Climbing and falling I don’t think it will ever be worth The suffocation No matter how hard I try I can no longer claim what is mine They say things they heal with time But I don’t know if that fits this rhyme or reason Pain is never here for just a season

Haunted : A simple story!

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The Haunted House on the hill was one I had always wanted to see. Feeling brave on a dark and dreary night, my friends and I decided we would go exploring together as a group. We figured going together would be less of a threat than going alone. After all, we were all avid fans of all things paranormal and what better time to go than in the fall! If I had to describe to what this haunted house looked like, I’d say that it was a typical looking haunted house. The kind with the old and frayed wood structure with an upstairs with a small window and adjacent windows are filled with candles. You know, the kinds you see in movies. I think the fact that it looked so familiar was one of the main reasons we were curious to visit this place. When we arrived, we parked in the rocky gravel parking lot. Since we were the only ones there, the parking lot had abundant spaces available. We tried our best to park in a space closest to the house. Though there were spaces closer than others, the hike...

My thoughts in a nutshell....

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I am a pretty cool chick. Very very laid back. Open to most people's beliefs (Notice I did not say ALL I said most). Having said that though, I am quite liberal in my thinking, which in the south, especially Louisiana, makes you a target at dinner parties so I just take the nod and smile approach most of the time. I'm happy go lucky, and I have just a little bit of funk added in for good measure! I'm an old soul and an introspective thinker. I am as independent as I can be by nature and have a spirit that does its best to withstand damn near everything that is tossed my way. I'm stubbornly strong and aggressively optimistic.Despite my setbacks and downfalls, most of the time I manage to keep all of the aforementioned traits in check. You know those types of people who will change certain qualities to fit in with others? I think that is the most ridiculous thing. In my opinion, though, it is a classic sign of intimidation or insecurity within yourself. I spent SO many...

Top Ten signs you may have Cerebral Palsy and chronic pain

This is a list I came up with entitled “Ways to tell that you are experiencing Chronic Pain conditions and Cerebral Palsy”. As a side note, I know that everyone is affected differently, and this list might not completely tailor to all your issues, but I thought it would be fun! So, here we go: 1.) When you feel like you have run a marathon, but all you did was shower, get out and get dressed! Showering is quite a chore, right?? Anything to stay clean, though! 2.) When you are trying to put on socks, but because your toes don’t flex, they keep getting caught in the strings of fabric on the inside! You keep having to remove them and start over! Hey, persistence wins! 3.) When your legs decide they are little bunny Fu Fu and want to hop through the forest, but instead you are having an episode of Clonus, and your legs are delusional! I know clonus doesn’t hurt everyone, but it sure does hurt me!!! 4.) When you are trying to figure out why you are tired as soon as you got out of bed. Then...

Change Does a Body Good!

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Let’s talk about challenges. The definition of a challenge is something that is likely out of your comfort zone that you are tempted to try to accomplish. If you happen to watch you tube from time to time for pleasure, you will know that a lot of the creators do challenges. Some of these challenges include things like the cinnamon challenge and the baby food challenge. I believe that the creators do things like this for entertainment and because it creates a sense of shock. A challenge may come along in real life when you feel your choice of employment is too easy, and you tend to feel lackluster and too qualified. You may want to begin applying for a job that is harder or more apt to fit your qualifications. You may want to do this for sake of using your education in a more fitting way or to benefit and contribute to the world. If you keep doing the same thing over and over and it is not triggering your mind, you will become bored. Other emotions you may be experiencing is sta...

Pain as a part of the human experience

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I am diverting a little bit from the proposed topic I had originally thought about doing. I was inspired this morning because I was having a bad pain episode. I thought I would write a thoughtful post about the experience of pain, both physically and mentally. Pain is a universal experience. I know everyone has experienced pain at some point in their life. On multiple occasions, I’m sure. Pain can come in many different forms: Physical, emotional, mental. All are very unfortunate experiences, but to be honest, it is a part of the human experience. I have Cerebral Palsy as most if not all of you know. I have always experienced pain because of my disability. In case you are not aware, when you have CP, your muscles contract 24/7. As you can imagine, this can cause a “squeezing” sort of pain, and it can also cause your legs to tremble. The trembling does not cause pain. In ALL people who are effected, but it has always been a little tender to me. This is a pretty normal happening fo...

Don't let your fire burn out!

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Today’s blog focus will be a motivational quote piece. I strive to write these posts with the intention of helping others, but to be honest, it helps me sometimes too. I am human, too. I do tend to have a very optimistic attitude and try to keep it that way for the most part, but every now and then, I need to be reminded of the simple things, too. Life is filled with good things that demand a celebration and bad times which cause bad moods and anger. I have found that good and bad times are an equal balance of 50/50. I understand though that when a hardship occurs, we feel like the world is against us. We feel like nothing we ever do can go right. We just feel defeated and backed in a corner by life in general. I would like to think of this as a natural reaction to bad stimuli. It can knock you down and refuse to let you get back up, especially if you are already prone to depressive feelings or episodes. Some troubles are easier to get over in comparison to many other tough times...

Finding your Purpose

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Today’s blog is a diversion from the disability series and more about life’s purpose. I feel very strongly about my life’s purpose. It is what puts a “pep in my step”. It is one of the only things that makes me rise from my bed in the mornings. It is what keeps and puts a smile on my face. I believe that we all have a unique purpose in life. We are not meant to be stragglers or nomads. We were born with the innate idea that we are here to serve a specific purpose. A purpose that ignites your soul and enhances your human experience. The reason for living, if you will. I believe my purpose is to change the attitude climate of the world. To encourage those who are having a hard time or those who have not been dealt the best hand in life. In college, I thought my purpose was to counsel people up close and personally. I have a degree in social work because I thought that what I was meant to be doing in that time in my life. I would find out soon enough that I was sorely mistaken, but at ...

Free hand write/blog

I am switching it up for a day, and I decided to write a blog post freehand. I have been relying on the inspirational messages behind quotes to help assist my writing. I guess you could call it a prompt if you wanted to because that is how they have been working for me. I love expressing myself through written word and could not be grateful for my blessed talent. Writing as of late has been very therapeutic for me. Because I can get the words out on paper, I have been feeling better about myself in an all-around and individualistic sense. Of course, my well-being is of utmost importance to me. So, today I thought I’d write a post about trying to stay positive when everything around you seem to suggest negativity. I will be the first to admit that it is easy to get caught up in a web of negativity. It is so easy because much of what we see on the news media is focused on murders, turmoil, child abuse, child neglect, domestic abuse etc. The list is not exhaustive, and I probably coul...

A Lesson in Respect

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Respect is something we all desire, and in many cases, we demand it. We are human and we work hard. We want to be recognized for our contribution to society and admired by the people we work for. However, as we know, respect is something that is earned and not just handed to us on a silver platter. Respect, while an admirable quality, is not always earned in an easy fashion. In a world full of violence, bullying and insecurities, we are often prone to see the opposite of respect, which is disrespect, in at least one form or another. This is a very unfortunate statistic and situation. Especially at risk are those with disabilities. I can recount many situations where I was treated unfairly strictly based on my physical differences. I was laughed at, called names, and push around. This is a perfect example of people who demand respect, but when treating people as they do, cannot be expected to receive it. Maybe they will be commended by people who have similar aims, but they will cer...

Never ever give up Disability blog #2

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As a pretty eccentric human being, I take comfort in the fact that we can all be celebrated for being our own person. Just think about how boring this world would be if we were all the same. Nothing would ever get accomplished, and most of us would stay stale and stagnant. So, while I like being celebrated for being different, I also wish to be treated with the same regard as my fellow able-bodied population. Growing up with a disability which requires me to use a wheelchair to survive, I have met many people who assume that I must be some sort of super hero because I must remain intact while I depend on someone else to fulfill some of my most basic needs. While this is somewhat true, it does not reflect my character in its entirety. What I mean by this, is that I wish that more people could see me as a normal person who just needs a little more assistance than regularly required to do ordinary activities which are required for daily living. Feeling like a burden or a bother is a big...

5 days of poetry!!!!

I am doing some more things to just kind of shake my routine up. I am going to be writing a poem each day this week and then at the end of the week, you will see this completed project posted and linked to my blog. Monday’s piece is entitled “The Little Girl By the Sea” The little girl who lived by the sea She was sunburnt and fancy free What a joy she was to see Trashing around in the waves For days upon days Kicking through the waters Like she had been swimming well beyond her years Throwing away all her fears Watching her do this Brought me to tears Tuesday’s piece is entitled “Hurricane Winds” We are all preparing for the wild Hurricane Winds We seal down the house and board up the windows Hoping for the best Those hurricane winds can sure make a mess And are likely to increase your stress But you just must hold on tight And pray God takes care of the rest Wednesday’s piece is an oldie but a goodie. It is entitled “Redeeming Rainbow” Redeeming Rainbow As the bad thoughts pl...

For the One I love Powerful poetry

For the one I love Your presence is a gift from above It is so pure that it can be carried on the Right wing of a dove When you hug me tightly I feel like I could take off in flight The first night I encountered your beautiful face Is a memory that can never be erased For the one I love Please remember that I’ll never let you go My dedication will be something I’ll always show Especially on the days when you are feeling particularly low For the one I love I know life can force you to the floor Especially when you might have expected more However, you should be reminded that the tide Always return to the shore No matter how agonizing the chore For the one I love I will always remind you of how special you are How you helped me erase much of my scars How love can sneak up on you But can feel so good when it is true When you are feeling blue I’ll always be here for you For the one I love You ignite my purpose And remind me that I always have a reason to keep ...

Disability series blog #1

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This is the beginning of a new series of blogs I am writing that will explore and explain the world of disability quotes and inspiring words designed to help those of us affected by them live a more positive life. These quotes can range from simplistic to more complex. They can be found on google images. All you must do is search disability images and quotes of all kinds will appear at your fingertips. The quote I would like to discuss is “disability does not mean inability”. This quote could not be filled with more truth. From personal experience and from people’s lack of experience, I know that many assume that having a disability means that you are not as capable as most. Speaking from a viewpoint where people lack interaction with the disabled population, I have heard things like “ I am so happy to see you out and about” or “I am so glad you seem happy” Deep down inside, I know they mean well, and I figure that they don’t have a ton of experience with the disabled population so...

My Open Letter to Cerebral Palsy

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`This is a project I have wanted to do for quite some time now, but I was waiting on the right time to do it. I feel like today is the day, and I think it will be a great cathartic activity for me. So, here it is. An open letter to my cerebral palsy. Dear Cerebral Palsy, Although you are and have always been a part of me, I’ve worked hard to make certain I don’t allow you to consume my life. If I am honest, it has been a rather difficult process. Let’s start from the beginning though. In the beginning, I was not sure what to think of you. I did not know where this journey with a disability would take me. I would not describe this feeling as a feeling of distaste, but more of one of an uncertain path. I did not come to expect what I would learn about this world, even in my very first years. That is, that people are cruel. I do not know the reasoning for this. Maybe people just do not understand what they cannot imagine dealing with. Whatever the reason, I can say that my first tast...

Hiding from myself Creative corner post #2

The weather outside is less than pleasing, but I find that days like this are the best to try and hone my skills. This is the second installment in creative corner. Hiding from me Growing up differently from most people, I was always careful though not too careful about fitting in with others. In an effort to make some of the bullying and teasing stopped, I tried my best to fit in with anyone. Truth be told, though, I am not the type to form cliques or the type to gravitate towards a certain type of person. I am nice to whomever is nice to me., whether they are the popular kid or not. Making friends had never been a particular challenge for me. The challenge I was facing was with my inner being . I did not like myself at all, and I certainly did not trust myself at all. It would be months even years before I realized that I was essentially the problem. I had zero confidence. I was too afraid to look in the mirror because I didn’t like the person staring back at me. The saying that y...

Creative corner Installment #1

Hey, guys, I am shaking things up a little bit and taking a break from my usual quote interpretations, and I am writing some poetry. I am going to call this installment creative corner. Hope you enjoy the different approach for a while! Happy Monday! “Holding hands” Your hand is wrapped around mine Our hands intertwined and our fingers dancing with each other Our heart beats perfectly in time We run through the rain As if time will escape us Stomping in the puddles And hitting each other in the face With the water Squealing with laughter Like a delighted child It is simplistic times like this When I realize I am really Fourtunate to have you You pick me up when I am blue Sometimes our love truly is Too good to be true

Diversity and Bullying

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Unfortunately, bullying has been a problem for many people for years upon years. There is no easy answer to stop the stigmas attached to bullying . Bullying not only makes victims of it feel horribly about themselves personally at the moment which the mal treatment occurs, but it also means that they will have to deal with the residual scars of this treatment for years and perhaps decades to come. I was bullied from the time I was seven years old until about eighteen. I’ll be the first to tell you that it still affects my well-being. Yes, even fourteen years later. No matter how many times family or loved ones tell you that you are worth it & the world needs you to survive, the devil in your head always pops up and tells you otherwise. Those people who haven’t travelled this road may think it is rather simple to just “turn off that other voice in your head that arises with the negative thoughts. To those of us who have been victims of barrage of tumultuous treatment, it is not ...

Instant Gratification

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Life is so instantaneous these days. If you really think about it, everything is based around electronics. For example, if you have a smartphone, it is almost if you have a computer small enough to fit into your pocket. Want to watch the news before you get home? No problem. You can just whip out your phone, scroll through the applications on your phone, and you can probably find a broadcast of news that has been live streamed. The world is at your fingertips! Want to listen to the radio, but don’t have a radio? Don’t worry, there are plenty of apps you can download on your phone that will provide you with music in your hands. Understand me clearly: This is not going to be a post bashing the use of our technology. I am definitely guilty of using these things because they are instant and can be used in many ways to keep in touch with people and have the privilege of talking to and inspiring others, especially when I am mostly homebound during the week. However, since instant is what ...

Finding Your Passion

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Life is about passion. Even from the very beginning as a child, it seems we always are thinking about which passion suits us best. As a kid, we are very much influenced by what our parents do or by what we see on TV, especially if it looks “cool” at the time. The idea of what we wanted to be as a kid is likely to change quite frequently by the time we reach adulthood. For example, when I was a kid, I wanted to be a pediatrician. This was influenced by playing with my baby dolls and my fischer price doctor kit. As I grew into a teenager, I realized that the mathematics and chemistry courses required to be a doctor were not made for a mind like mine. I wanted the venture into the helping professions without having to handle that heavy course load. I decided at 18, that I wanted to go into the field of counseling/social work. I pursued this field of study in college, and even for a short time, I even went beyond the bachelors degree and decided to go for my masters. College for me was...

LET IT GO!

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Everybody comes from something, someone, and somewhere. We may not always associate ourselves with our parents (the someone) due to estranged relationship within the family dynamic. We may be ashamed of the place we come from due to a stigma of our state’s residents. (the somewhere)Finally, if we are living and breathing creatures, we have a past. (The something). We may have regrets from our past such as poor relationship decisions or poor personal choices. As human beings, we tend to hold on to the past. It is almost like we are Guinea pigs going around and around on our “wheel”, ultimately leading to no real destination. We tend to hold grudges when the people who love us most end up hurting our feelings. The grudges then naturally halt the relationship therefore putting even more strain on those dynamics. We may be looking upon the past with a negative attitude because of bad life experiences. When I was a teenager, I was scared by many of the experiences I had in high schoo...