What is true love?

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I often wonder what it feels like to be in love, or if it is even a feeling at all. Maybe it is just a tempting emotion that waits in the wings, teasing us every chance it gets. Tempting it may be, but one thing I know for sure it that it causes hurt and heartbreak. This is not meant to be a negative viewpoint piece, but rather one written with a sense of curiosity and wonderment. I am human, and from time to time, I crave the feeling of love. Not so much the feeling though, I guess so much as the cute little things that come along with loving another person. For instance, the tight hugs when you need someone to hold and comfort you and the notion that there will always be someone there for you, even through the darkest and most terrible moments. Most of all, though, it is having someone you can complain to during those harder times that you would like to forget about. As a person with a disability, dating and having a significant other has been something I have struggled with for a long period of time. I think the main reason is that people are scared of what they don’t understand or can’t imagine living with a disability. It is either that or they don’t want to take on the extra responsibility. I have always struggled with feeling like a burden and this prospect makes that feeling worse. This was harder for me as a teen than it is now. Simply because now, I actually couldn’t care less about having a man to date. I have become accustomed to my own company and don’t mind if I am alone. As a teen, it was a different story because everyone around me had a significant other, and in many ways, I have always felt left out. I have seen love in movies where love just so happens to sneak up on someone on their trip to the quaint coffee shop and the rest is history. They end up in a perfect relationship with sunshine and rainbows. I know that this is mostly for the film because that is not how real life works, and I am well aware of that. To be honest, I don’t really have the things needed to get out and go meet people, and my disability does not allow me to travel independently, especially now as I age. So. I guess you could say at this point in time that I am not trying to find love and you would be correct. I am fine. I am just human and feeling love romantically is something I will always wonder about. It is something that will remain in the back of my mind, but if it doesn’t happen, that’s fine, too.

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